Okay so the picture above is of my wife Brooklyn’s sunday meal of Oxtail & Rice. It is the best I’ve ever had! Seriously! This was her first time making it & trust me she hit it out if the park with this one! I’m not big on beef, I’m a turkey or chicken man myself, but this had me going back for seconds!
I just thought I’d share that bit of info & if you’re in Atlanta and want a challenge then bring it! Just kidding.
Peace
Sincere
Oh yeah I posted this whole thing, pic and all, from my blackberry with the wordpress app, dope right? I know I know, no big whoop but I find joy in the little things! Haha
Okay so a friend hit me up on facebook talking about how her child’s father doesn’t do anything for the child and how trifling he is. Okay this is not a new occurrence. As I probe more she tells me that he has 4 other kids by 3 different women and he doesn’t take care of any of them. me being me, I ask her if she knew about this before she got with him? She quickly answered yes. So of course my next question was, if he’s not taking care of the 4 he had before why would you even get into any type of relations with this dude? I mean am I missing something? If you know he doesn’t take care of his other kids then why would you think he’s going to take care of one more from you? Foolishness.
I just don’t get it. Then once she has a baby with him and he doesn’t do anything to support the child she decides to dog him on facebook via status updates. I’ll never understand why people put all their business in the status updates and on twitter anyway, but that’s a different post. whenever I see someone do this I call them on it. You knew he or she was trifling before you laid down with them all those times but now that you have a child and you see that he’s not doing anything you want to dog him. I am in no way condoning the guys’ behavior but c’mon son! That’s like you buy a car knowing it has a bad engine then get mad at the person who sold it when it breaks down. You knew going in that if you got pregnant that it wouldn’t end well! Get over yourself and move on.
This is not about those guys that changed once the woman gets pregnant. I know there are plenty of guys that have done that. This is about the ones that are no good to start with yet women continue to be with them. They pass up a good guy that will treat them with respect to be with the jerk that treats them like crap. I guess good guys do finish last. I think women are attracted to that bad boy image. I see it all the time. Women that have this long list of what she wants in a man, ya know like nice, respectful, neat blah blah. So you’re thinking okay she wants a good guy bu then when you see her date or boyfriend he’s the total opposite of what she says she wants. This was so frustrating to me growing up. I was always taught to treat women with respect so that’s what I did but for a little while when that wasn’t working I went into the bad boy ish phase and treated girls like objects as opposed to the young women that they were. Funny thing is, I ended up being with more girls as a bad boy pseudo thug then by being a gentleman. I know this is going in a different direction but it will all come back full circle. See these same women that are dogging the thug because he got her pregnant with his 5th or 6th child, that he has no intentions of taking care of, are the same women that have this long list of things they want in a man. Ya know, treats them nice, takes care of them, neat, respectful?
All I can say is that it takes two people to have a baby, and yes he is not doing his part to help raise the child, you were aware of this before you even got serious enough to sleep with him. Yet you did it anyway, now you want to put all the blame on him. Is that fair? No. Is he being fair to you by not taking care of his seed? No.
The bottom line is, people need to be more careful about who they decide to lay down with. Especially if you know their past history of neglecting their children. We really need to wise up and realize that this doesn’t do anything but hurt the child. I don’t care what anybody says or how ‘independent’ the woman is a child needs both a mother and a father. A boy needs to learn certain things from a man and a girl needs to learn certain things from a woman. If I had a daughter and no wife or woman in her life then when she started to have her period, for example, I wouldn’t be nearly as knowledgeable about it as my wife or the woman in my life would be. I could read a million books but that woman could give her first hand knowledge. If a boy grows up with his mother and no father or male figure, he is missing out on certain things as well. I do believe single parents can raise happy, well rounded, adjusted children into successful adults but with that extra male or female figure it makes it a little easier.
Take from this what you may but remember that it takes two to tango and if you knew he wasn’t worth a damn from the jump then you should have kept your legs closed. Period. End of discussion. Now your child(ren) has to suffer because of your indiscretions. Child please.
So for like the last month I haven’t been feeling good. Nothing major I was just tired, extra thirsty, frequent urination, just not myself. A couple of days ago I started getting blurred vision. It wasn’t enough to keep me from seeing but it was like I was slightly squinting my eyes all the time, even when I wasn’t. This had me nervous a bit as you might imagine. Diabetes and heart disease run in my family on my mother’s side and all my symptoms pointed towards me having it as well. How could this be? I mean I watch what I eat, exercise on a regular basis, why me? Well, it doesn’t matter why, it just matters that it did. Anyway, I go to my doctor and he checks my sugar levels and cholesterol after I tell him what’s going on with me. Comes back and my blood sugar and cholesterol levels are through the roof!!! I mean I was a heart attack waiting to happen. My blood sugar was over 500 and my cholesterol was 413 ( the average Blood sugar level is about 86 and the average cholesterol level is 50-60)!! He gives me 2 medications for the diabetes and one for the cholesterol, tells me to set an appointment with an endocrinologist as well as a nutritionist. I have to test my blood sugar levels before and 2 hrs after ever meal and come back to see him in a week to make further plans. I’m telling you, this was some scary shit. Imagine going to the doctor thinking you’re healthy and you get hit with those numbers. What’s even scarier was that the day before I went to the doctor I felt really bad for a while after I first woke up. Just tired, couldn’t catch my breath, chest heavy. Could that have been the beginning of something major? I’m too young to die, I can’t James Dean (die young, leaving a good looking corpse) my family, they need me.
So today is the day after my diagnosis and I decided to go to work at first. Got there and my boss is looking at me like I”m crazy. I show her my meds because she’s also diabetic and she really looks at me like I’m crazy. Tells me that I should go home for today because my body has to get used to this medication and it’ll make me wonky at first. I didn’t’ believe her. Took the meds and 10 minutes later I’m feeling crazy. So I go home and commence the pity party. You see today is the only day I will have it because I will beat this thing, it will not beat me.
I encourage anyone reading this to get checked out. Especially if it runs in your family. This is not something that I expected to happen to me, but it did and now I must deal with it. don’t be afraid to ask questions and get checked out. If I had done that years ago maybe I wouldn’t be in this situation now. Your health is more important than you think. Being healthy is not just for you, it’s for your family and friends as well.
Another thing, I’m not sure if you noticed or not but medication is expensive as hell!! I have to get Liptitor for my Cholesterol and that is $133.42!!! Yes $133.42!!! both my diabetes meds came up to like $10 but that Lipitor was crazy! Now I understand why people on a fixed income or elderly skip months because they can’t afford it! My punk ass insurance company only paid $21 towards it. $21!!! What the hell!!!
President Obama Spoke at the NAACP’s Centennial convention on Thursday (July 16th) night and gave an awe inspiring speech. He told the thousands in attendance and the others (like myself) watching via the NAACP working with A T & T’s Webcast.
In his speech he recognized the troubles that black America faces but also acknowledged that we must take responsibility for some of our own troubles. “They might think they’ve got a pretty jump shot or a pretty good flow, but our kids can’t all aspire to be LeBron or Lil Wayne. I want them aspiring to be scientists and engineers, doctors and teachers, not just ballers and rappers. I want them aspiring to be a Supreme Court Justice. I want them aspiring to be President of the United States of America.’’- Pres. Obama
The video *courtesy of NAACP’s Youtube Channel* and transcript * Courtesy of Oliverwillis.com* below:
“It is an honor to be here, in the city where the NAACP was formed, to mark its centennial. What we celebrate tonight is not simply the journey the NAACP has traveled, but the journey that we, as Americans, have traveled over the past one hundred years.
It is a journey that takes us back to a time before most of us were born, long before the Voting Rights Act, the Civil Rights Act, and Brown v. Board of Education; back to an America just a generation past slavery. It was a time when Jim Crow was a way of life; when lynchings were all too common; and when race riots were shaking cities across a segregated land.
It was in this America where an Atlanta scholar named W.E.B. Du Bois, a man of towering intellect and a fierce passion for justice, sparked what became known as the Niagara movement; where reformers united, not by color but cause; and where an association was born that would, as its charter says, promote equality and eradicate prejudice among citizens of the United States.
From the beginning, Du Bois understood how change would come – just as King and all the civil rights giants did later. They understood that unjust laws needed to be overturned; that legislation needed to be passed; and that Presidents needed to be pressured into action. They knew that the stain of slavery and the sin of segregation had to be lifted in the courtroom and in the legislature.
But they also knew that here, in America, change would have to come from the people. It would come from people protesting lynching, rallying against violence, and walking instead of taking the bus. It would come from men and women – of every age and faith, race and region – taking Greyhounds on Freedom Rides; taking seats at Greensboro lunch counters; and registering voters in rural Mississippi, knowing they would be harassed, knowing they would be beaten, knowing that they might never return.
Because of what they did, we are a more perfect union. Because Jim Crow laws were overturned, black CEOs today run Fortune 500 companies. Because civil rights laws were passed, black mayors, governors, and Members of Congress serve in places where they might once have been unable to vote. And because ordinary people made the civil rights movement their own, I made a trip to Springfield a couple years ago – where Lincoln once lived, and race riots once raged – and began the journey that has led me here tonight as the 44th President of the United States of America.
And yet, even as we celebrate the remarkable achievements of the past one hundred years; even as we inherit extraordinary progress that cannot be denied; even as we marvel at the courage and determination of so many plain folks – we know that too many barriers still remain.
We know that even as our economic crisis batters Americans of all races, African Americans are out of work more than just about anyone else – a gap that’s widening here in New York City, as detailed in a report this week by Comptroller Bill Thompson.
We know that even as spiraling health care costs crush families of all races, African Americans are more likely to suffer from a host of diseases but less likely to own health insurance than just about anyone else.
We know that even as we imprison more people of all races than any nation in the world, an African-American child is roughly five times as likely as a white child to see the inside of a jail.
And we know that even as the scourge of HIV/AIDS devastates nations abroad, particularly in Africa, it is devastating the African-American community here at home with disproportionate force.
These are some of the barriers of our time. They’re very different from the barriers faced by earlier generations. They’re very different from the ones faced when fire hoses and dogs were being turned on young marchers; when Charles Hamilton Houston and a group of young Howard lawyers were dismantling segregation.
But what is required to overcome today’s barriers is the same as was needed then. The same commitment. The same sense of urgency. The same sense of sacrifice. The same willingness to do our part for ourselves and one another that has always defined America at its best.
The question, then, is where do we direct our efforts? What steps do we take to overcome these barriers? How do we move forward in the next one hundred years?
The first thing we need to do is make real the words of your charter and eradicate prejudice, bigotry, and discrimination among citizens of the United States. I understand there may be a temptation among some to think that discrimination is no longer a problem in 2009. And I believe that overall, there’s probably never been less discrimination in America than there is today.
But make no mistake: the pain of discrimination is still felt in America. By African-American women paid less for doing the same work as colleagues of a different color and gender. By Latinos made to feel unwelcome in their own country. By Muslim Americans viewed with suspicion for simply kneeling down to pray. By our gay brothers and sisters, still taunted, still attacked, still denied their rights.
On the 45th anniversary of the Civil Rights Act, discrimination must not stand. Not on account of color or gender; how you worship or who you love. Prejudice has no place in the United States of America.
But we also know that prejudice and discrimination are not even the steepest barriers to opportunity today. The most difficult barriers include structural inequalities that our nation’s legacy of discrimination has left behind; inequalities still plaguing too many communities and too often the object of national neglect.
These are barriers we are beginning to tear down by rewarding work with an expanded tax credit; making housing more affordable; and giving ex-offenders a second chance. These are barriers that we are targeting through our White House Office on Urban Affairs, and through Promise Neighborhoods that build on Geoffrey Canada’s success with the Harlem Children’s Zone; and that foster a comprehensive approach to ending poverty by putting all children on a pathway to college, and giving them the schooling and support to get there.
But our task of reducing these structural inequalities has been made more difficult by the state, and structure, of the broader economy; an economy fueled by a cycle of boom and bust; an economy built not on a rock, but sand. That is why my administration is working so hard not only to create and save jobs in the short-term, not only to extend unemployment insurance and help for people who have lost their health care, not only to stem this immediate economic crisis, but to lay a new foundation for growth and prosperity that will put opportunity within reach not just for African Americans, but for all Americans.
One pillar of this new foundation is health insurance reform that cuts costs, makes quality health coverage affordable for all, and closes health care disparities in the process. Another pillar is energy reform that makes clean energy profitable, freeing America from the grip of foreign oil, putting people to work upgrading low-income homes, and creating jobs that cannot be outsourced. And another pillar is financial reform with consumer protections to crack down on mortgage fraud and stop predatory lenders from targeting our poor communities.
All these things will make America stronger and more competitive. They will drive innovation, create jobs, and provide families more security. Still, even if we do it all, the African-American community will fall behind in the United States and the United States will fall behind in the world unless we do a far better job than we have been doing of educating our sons and daughters. In the 21st century – when so many jobs will require a bachelor’s degree or more, when countries that out-educate us today will outcompete us tomorrow – a world-class education is a prerequisite for success.
You know what I’m talking about. There’s a reason the story of the civil rights movement was written in our schools. There’s a reason Thurgood Marshall took up the cause of Linda Brown. There’s a reason the Little Rock Nine defied a governor and a mob. It’s because there is no stronger weapon against inequality and no better path to opportunity than an education that can unlock a child’s God-given potential.
Yet, more than a half century after Brown v. Board of Education, the dream of a world-class education is still being deferred all across this country. African-American students are lagging behind white classmates in reading and math – an achievement gap that is growing in states that once led the way on civil rights. Over half of all African-American students are dropping out of school in some places. There are overcrowded classrooms, crumbling schools, and corridors of shame in America filled with poor children – black, brown, and white alike.
The state of our schools is not an African-American problem; it’s an American problem. And if Al Sharpton, Mike Bloomberg, and Newt Gingrich can agree that we need to solve it, then all of us can agree on that. All of us can agree that we need to offer every child in this country the best education the world has to offer from the cradle through a career.
That is our responsibility as the United States of America. And we, all of us in government, are working to do our part by not only offering more resources, but demanding more reform.
When it comes to higher education, we are making college and advanced training more affordable, and strengthening community colleges that are a gateway to so many with an initiative that will prepare students not only to earn a degree but find a job when they graduate; an initiative that will help us meet the goal I have set of leading the world in college degrees by 2020.
We are creating a Race to the Top Fund that will reward states and public school districts that adopt 21st century standards and assessments. And we are creating incentives for states to promote excellent teachers and replace bad ones – because the job of a teacher is too important for us to accept anything but the best.
We should also explore innovative approaches being pursued here in New York City; innovations like Bard High School Early College and Medgar Evers College Preparatory School that are challenging students to complete high school and earn a free associate’s degree or college credit in just four years.
And we should raise the bar when it comes to early learning programs. Today, some early learning programs are excellent. Some are mediocre. And some are wasting what studies show are – by far – a child’s most formative years.
That’s why I have issued a challenge to America’s governors: if you match the success of states like Pennsylvania and develop an effective model for early learning; if you focus reform on standards and results in early learning programs; if you demonstrate how you will prepare the lowest income children to meet the highest standards of success – you can compete for an Early Learning Challenge Grant that will help prepare all our children to enter kindergarten ready to learn.
So, these are some of the laws we are passing. These are some of the policies we are enacting. These are some of the ways we are doing our part in government to overcome the inequities, injustices, and barriers that exist in our country.
But all these innovative programs and expanded opportunities will not, in and of themselves, make a difference if each of us, as parents and as community leaders, fail to do our part by encouraging excellence in our children. Government programs alone won’t get our children to the Promised Land. We need a new mindset, a new set of attitudes – because one of the most durable and destructive legacies of discrimination is the way that we have internalized a sense of limitation; how so many in our community have come to expect so little of ourselves.
We have to say to our children, Yes, if you’re African American, the odds of growing up amid crime and gangs are higher. Yes, if you live in a poor neighborhood, you will face challenges that someone in a wealthy suburb does not. But that’s not a reason to get bad grades, that’s not a reason to cut class, that’s not a reason to give up on your education and drop out of school. No one has written your destiny for you. Your destiny is in your hands – and don’t you forget that.
To parents, we can’t tell our kids to do well in school and fail to support them when they get home. For our kids to excel, we must accept our own responsibilities. That means putting away the Xbox and putting our kids to bed at a reasonable hour. It means attending those parent-teacher conferences, reading to our kids, and helping them with their homework.
And it means we need to be there for our neighbor’s son or daughter, and return to the day when we parents let each other know if we saw a child acting up. That’s the meaning of community. That’s how we can reclaim the strength, the determination, the hopefulness that helped us come as far as we already have.
It also means pushing our kids to set their sights higher. They might think they’ve got a pretty good jump shot or a pretty good flow, but our kids can’t all aspire to be the next LeBron or Lil Wayne. I want them aspiring to be scientists and engineers, doctors and teachers, not just ballers and rappers. I want them aspiring to be a Supreme Court Justice. I want them aspiring to be President of the United States.
So, yes, government must be a force for opportunity. Yes, government must be a force for equality. But ultimately, if we are to be true to our past, then we also have to seize our own destiny, each and every day.
That is what the NAACP is all about. The NAACP was not founded in search of a handout. The NAACP was not founded in search of favors. The NAACP was founded on a firm notion of justice; to cash the promissory note of America that says all our children, all God’s children, deserve a fair chance in the race of life.
It is a simple dream, and yet one that has been denied – one still being denied – to so many Americans. It’s a painful thing, seeing that dream denied. I remember visiting a Chicago school in a rough neighborhood as a community organizer, and thinking how remarkable it was that all of these children seemed so full of hope, despite being born into poverty, despite being delivered into addiction, despite all the obstacles they were already facing.
And I remember the principal of the school telling me that soon all of that would begin to change; that soon, the laughter in their eyes would begin to fade; that soon, something would shut off inside, as it sunk in that their hopes would not come to pass – not because they weren’t smart enough, not because they weren’t talented enough, but because, by accident of birth, they didn’t have a fair chance in life.
So, I know what can happen to a child who doesn’t have that chance. But I also know what can happen to a child who does. I was raised by a single mother. I don’t come from a lot of wealth. I got into my share of trouble as a kid. My life could easily have taken a turn for the worse. But that mother of mine gave me love; she pushed me, and cared about my education; she took no lip and taught me right from wrong. Because of her, I had a chance to make the most of my abilities. I had the chance to make the most of my opportunities. I had the chance to make the most of life.
The same story holds for Michelle. The same story holds for so many of you. And I want all the other Barack Obamas out there, and all the other Michelle Obamas out there, to have that same chance – the chance that my mother gave me; that my education gave me; that the United States of America gave me. That is how our union will be perfected and our economy rebuilt. That is how America will move forward in the next one hundred years.
And we will move forward. This I know – for I know how far we have come. Last week, in Ghana, Michelle and I took Malia and Sasha to Cape Coast Castle, where captives were once imprisoned before being auctioned; where, across an ocean, so much of the African-American experience began. There, reflecting on the dungeon beneath the castle church, I was reminded of all the pain and all the hardships, all the injustices and all the indignities on the voyage from slavery to freedom.
But I was also reminded of something else. I was reminded that no matter how bitter the rod or how stony the road, we have persevered. We have not faltered, nor have we grown weary. As Americans, we have demanded, strived for, and shaped a better destiny.
That is what we are called to do once more. It will not be easy. It will take time. Doubts may rise and hopes recede.
But if John Lewis could brave Billy clubs to cross a bridge, then I know young people today can do their part to lift up our communities.
If Emmet Till’s uncle Mose Wright could summon the courage to testify against the men who killed his nephew, I know we can be better fathers and brothers, mothers and sisters in our own families.
If three civil rights workers in Mississippi – black and white, Christian and Jew, city-born and country-bred – could lay down their lives in freedom’s cause, I know we can come together to face down the challenges of our own time. We can fix our schools, heal our sick, and rescue our youth from violence and despair.
One hundred years from now, on the 200th anniversary of the NAACP, let it be said that this generation did its part; that we too ran the race; that full of the faith that our dark past has taught us, full of the hope that the present has brought us, we faced, in our own lives and all across this nation, the rising sun of a new day begun. Thank you, God bless you, and may God bless the United States of America.”
“Sat up in my bed
turned my alarm off
As I looked at the time What the F**k!!
It’s already 6:30!!!
Awwwwww!!”
I do this every morning, but the other morning I had an epiphany of sorts. I realized I need to go back to school. Not because of waking up early, I would do that regardless, but because I’m waking up early to go to work for someone else when I could be waking up early to work for myself.
I have been to college before, but left after 2.5 years. See, I was looking at my situation instead of past it. If I looked past it I would have seen that I was halfway through and if I held out a little longer then I would have been done and free to do whatever. At the time I didn’t have the insight that I do now, obviously. They say hindsight is the best foresight right?
the glass seemed half empty instead of half full. At the time I felt like Kanye. I felt that in those 2.5 yrs I hadn’t learned anything that I didn’t already know. Well, duh!! I wasn’t fully into my major yet. Maybe some of my classes weren’t the most informative but maybe that’s why they call them prerequisites, they teach you what you need to know for the next level. I was not getting that and wanted out.
So I dash off into the military thinking that if I don’t retire in the military the experience will count the same a college degree right? I mean that’s real life experience. Wrong!! While employers make sure that you know that they “thank you for your service” or “appreciate your service and sacrifice for your country“, I don’t think it sways any votes either way. without that paper to back me up, it doesn’t really count for much. Unless you’re trying to work security or some other government faction. Don’t get me wrong, I have gotten lucky and have had some prior military hiring recruiters to look out for me at jobs in the past but overall I don’t think it helped or hurt.
Anyway, so I hope to go back to school to not only finish my degree but make my mother proud. She sacrificed a lot to send me to school only for me to drop out without any kind of explanation other than “I’m just not feeling it“. School isn’t for everyone but I don’t think I really ever gave it a chance.
My first major was Broadcast Journalism with a minor in music, but I think I’m going to switch that major to business and I may minor in something related to english or journalism if I can.
I’m also doing this for my son. To show him that you should never give up and quit no matter what it is or how long it takes you to finish it. I want him to grow up and think “This is my dad!“, not “This is my dad?“.
Since I’ll be footing the bill myself, unless that financial aid comes through, It may take a little longer than I want but the end result will be worth it.
While adding some photos I had just taken to my external hard drive I decided to take a little trip down photo memory lane. It’s crazy how fast Boogie has grown and how big he has gotten. It seems like just last week I was holding him in my arms as I rocked him back to sleep. They grow up so fast! He is truly a blessing to my wife and I and I don’t know what our life would be like without him.
There’s nothing like a first born son. *shouts to my big brother Raw Dawg Buffalo for pointing that out to me* Since I began working from home and spending everyday all day with him, I’ve realized it. Before I would come home and be so busy doing other stuff that I neglected the little things. For a while we did not get along at all, seems everytime I would tell him to do something it was a problem. Now we’re like two peas in a pod! He wants to do everything I do and go everywhere I go. I mean EVERYWHERE!
I can’t understand why people could leave children and not be in their lives. I am not judging though, I mean to each his/her own but I could never see my self leaving my child no matter what issues I may have with his mother. He is more important to me than that. But that’s for another post.
Okay so me and my sister Sane were chopping it up about the craziness that is Yo Gabba Gabba and DJ Lance and I told her about my love for this song called “Papa Moco Jumbie” that is a sort of segue way after the show. For some reason Boogie and I love this song! it’s a really catchy song and once it gets in your head it’s hard to get out. Here’s a clip of it. Sorry this is the best one I could find. for some reason Noggin/Nickelodeon hasn’t released this officially.
In case you were wondering, the little boy singing is actually Khamani Griffin aka little Bobby from ‘All Of Us’. You know the show with Lisa Raye, Duane Martin, Tony Rock (Chris Rock’s little Brother) and Elise Neal. The Moco Jumbie show is scheduled for fall release and will be about a little boy and his father bonding during carnival time. All my Caribbean & West Indian folks know how important and big Carnival (pronounced Car- knee- vol) is to the culture. It’s written by Radha Blank (<–scroll down on that page). She has written for other Nick shows such as Little Bill and The Backyardigans (Two of Boogies favorites)
I don’t care what Sane says, I think the song is cute and I can’t wait for the show to air!
Okay so as I’m getting re acclimated to my laptop and perusing around the innanetz, i’m bombarded with all kinds of emails, im’s, tweets and websites talking about this Chris Brown and Rihanna thing. If that’s your thing then cool, do you but it’s stuff out there that’s bigger than that. Yeah I understand the whole domestic violence issue but what about the 15 year old girl that got molly whopped by two big ole cops while in their custody? I had first heard this story a while ago (around the time of the unfortunate situation in the Bay area) but it went under my radar because there wasn’t any video. Recently there has been video that surfaced. Why it took a year for this to come out is your guess just as good as mine but nonetheless it is out and unfortunately will probably go unnoticed because the people that usually talk about and air out these type of things are wondering why Chris and Rihanna were in Miami and if they secretly got married.
Look, all I’m saying is that it’s bigger issues going on right now rather than copy catting and reporting the same news that every other news outlet is posting. Remember the Jena 6? So many bloggers picked up on it that the media had to take notice. I’m not trying to be all self righteous like I only talk about social ills and such but I just get tired of reading the same thing every time I go to these different sights or seeing the same thing tweeted or hearing the same thing over and over. Not even like they change it up and kick it from their perspective, nope. They just tell it straight like the other person.
Okay that’s the end of my rant. On to happier/different stuff.
After being home with my son all day every day for the past 2-3 weeks, I think I sorta understand what it’s like to be a single parent. Only difference is that when Mommy comes home, I can have a break or do some of the things that I couldn’t do with just me and him. I tip my hat to any and all single parents. I truly do. I don’t see how you do it day in and day out and still have the time/energy to do other things as well. I’m still looking out for that 25th hour that some of you guys seem to have.
I really need to start going to bed before 3 am. It’s really messing me up.
Aiight so on that note I’m out.
So I have made it to see another birthday. I really don’t celebrate my birthday by doing anything big because it will always be overshadowed by New Year’s eve. If you don’t know today is my birthday and I’m 29! That’s one year from my thirties and the last year of my twenties. Have I reached any of the goals I set like 10 years ago? Nope. Not even close. I kind of gave up on setting goals a long time ago. It’s just a big disappointment when I don’t reach them. Maybe I should just make realistic goals instead… Hmmm, maybe I’ll try that instead.
This year has been pretty uneventful actually. This was my first ‘official’ year living in Atlanta and I still haven’t gone to the Aquarium or the zoo. I’m a home body so as long as I have food, tv and internet I’m content. This year I realized that I am too addicted to technology. I know I’ve talked about my addiction in other posts but it’s ridiculous. I really need to disconnect from the Matrix.
I still can’t really believe that I’m 29. From looking at me you couldn’t tell. I still look like I’m 16. Okay maybe 18. *Thanks to my pork free diet!* There really hasn’t been a big change since last year and this year so let’s raise our glasses *lifting cup of Grey Goose & Cranapple juice* and toast to good life and good love!!!
“It’s okay to lose your pride over love, it’s not okay to lose your love over pride.” – Nana Sincere
When do you know that it’s time to throw in the towel per say? I hear talk of people saying that you just ‘grow apart’ but do you really grow apart or do those little idiosyncrasies build and fester over time driving you apart? We all have our little things or quirks about our significant other that drive us up the wall but when is enough actually enough? Now I’m not an advocate for divorce but sometimes it’s better to just severe ties, cut your losses and move on. My wife and I have so many married friends that are unhappy. I’m always like why? why be with someone that doesn’t make you happy? I can’t spend the rest of my life, or any time of my life, with someone that doesn’t make me happy. If I cringe every time I see their face then they must not be the one for me and I need to move on. It doesn’t help either person in either way.
I remember at one point feeling like some type of marriage counselor. Our friends would look at our relationship from the outside and say ‘I want that’ or ‘how do you guys do it?’. From the outside things will always look fine because we have a united front. You will never know what strings are being pulled behind the curtain. Not to suggest that our marriage and love for each other is in anyway forced or fake but to say that our internal problems/issues always remain just that. Internal.
A good friend of mine from way back hit me on my gmail about some marital advice since I send out ‘Sincere Thoughts’ (Words of wisdom-ish stuff)by email every morning. Well, almost every morning, I try… If you want to get on the blast just send me your email address. I of course replied to him with what I would do in a situation like theirs. I decided to share some of the points.
1. Communication is key:
If you’re mad at me for something I did or didn’t do how am I to know if you don’t say so.
2. Be observant. You don’t have to be meticulous or a private eye with it, just pick up on different vibes and roll with it. If you notice he/she is tired, offer a massage or to take over one of their tasks for them. Things like that.
3.Be spontaneous. I would send my wife flowers or a card just to say ‘hi & I’m thinking about you’ for example. It doesn’t always to be some big elaborate thing. It’s the little things that matter the most.
4. A happy wife= a happy life. This goes both ways too. No matter who wears ‘the pants’ in your relationship, a happy spouse is important. Remember, if you’re not making them happy they can and will find someone or something else that will.
5. Pride will take you nowhere but to the corner of Lonely Ave and Heartbreak Blvd. It’s not always about you! Relationships are a give and take. You have to be able to give just as much as you take. Don’t let pride make you feel like you’re too big or bold to apologize when you’re wrong or humble yourself and take direction. You have to be able to release that pride to keep your marriage on track.
Those were just a few of the things that I try and live by. What keeps us happy may not work for you so I say don’t follow the advice of everyone, including me, verbatim but modify it to fit your life. This is not just a model for marriage. It can be applied to any relationship you may be in. I have never professed to be an expert or guru on any subject but I just like to pass along things that have helped me in hopes that it’ll help you.
If after doing these things and you still feel like it’s not working then when all else fails… Move on. Your happiness is what’s best.
This is just a little update as to what’s been going on lately. Let’s see… I let my emotions get the best of me on last Wednesday and quit my job. If you’ve been following me for a while than you know that it wasn’t the best of situations to work in. From the racist customers and administration not having my back to condescending doctors that think that just because I didn’t spend umpteen years in school than I’m an idiot. It all came to it’s boiling point when I got written up for something I didn’t even do. when I brought it to my supervisor’s attention that I didn’t do it and who really did it, I was told it didn’t matter who did it because I was getting written up for it. “Really, Well fuck it I’m done with this I quit!” *my exact words* Well luckily that wasn’t my only source of income or I would’ve been in the dog house when I got home. Literally… So I quit on Wednesday and I get a call from another company, that I submitted my resume to like I know at least 4-5 months ago, asking if I was still interested in a position with them and if so could I come in that day for an interview. Talk about a blessing! I started on Monday! It’s more pay, better hours, benefits and work environment.
I have been really busy lately with moving and trying to write as much as possible for some ventures I’m trying to get going. Can’t reveal it all just yet because they are still in the works.
I went home to South Carolina this past weekend for a family get together. I haven’t seen my entire family like that in at least 2 1/2 years. It felt really good to connect with my people again. I really need to visit more often. I also learned that my great great grandparents, my mom’s great grandparents, were the first to come over from Nigeria. What up Tayo!
Ummmerra.. That’s about it.